flow these methods

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Why is Love So Complicated

Love is one of life's most basic needs. However: it is also the most elusive. Love becomes complicated when we mix it with other factors such as, peer pressure, idealism, and fantasy. We should put all these things into their proper perspective to co-exist with love. Let us clear up some of the mystique behind this elusive giant.

Some people fall in love with the idea of love and exclude the person they profess to love. Others love each other with two different kinds of love. Moreover, some people use the name of love to cover up emotional, Physiological or sociological tendencies.

A romantic person can make an emotional mountain out of the faint spark of a casual relationship. Most of the relationship is played out in his or hers mind with little help or reciprocation from their mate.

There are many signs of this type of relationship. You will find that the romantic is the sole contributor to the relationship, although the partner may make a minimum contribution for conscience or appearance sake.

The romantic might buy tickets for a cruise and the partner may purchase the wine. The romantic does not understand why his or her partner does not sit back and enjoy the ride; after all, they are doing most of the work. This relationship usually ends when the partner becomes bored or finds someone that they choose as oppose to someone who chose them.

The romantic should stand back and measure the compromise and sacrifice of his or her partner. Emotions can easily smother rational thinking. The overly romantic should surround themselves with sensible people and keep them in the loop. They should ask for play-by-play advice. Their mentor will see things that he or she will miss.

Often, when a person says, "I love you," they are requesting a contract or an agreement. The contract is made once the other person responds, "I love you to." Like every contract, the terms should been defined. Every recipient of love should ask three questions: "What kind of love do you love me with, what are you offering to me, what do you expect from me?

There are several kinds of love recorded in the Bible. One type is agapeo love. This type of love is a commitment type of love. It takes very little emotion but a lot of commitment and discipline to function in this type of love. The first marriage was based on the agapeo type of love. Adam and Eve expressed very little emotions toward each other. Rather they shared a sense of duty and commitment to their cause to multiply.

Later in the Bible, you can read where passion played a significant part in other relationships for example, David and Beersheba, Jacob and Rachel. The next type is agapa love. This is the affectionate type love you find in fairy tales. Trouble arises when visions of an affectionate love lures a partner from a commitment type of love. Idealistically, an affectionate love develops from a commitment type of love. Sometimes an affectionate love motivates a commitment type love. A person may be attracted to someone outside of the relationship. A person may label that attraction 'love' to provide a socially acceptable excuse to breach their prior commitment. However, these are not all the types of love these are the most common.

Dating is most enjoyable and fulfilling when both partners are free from emotional, sociological or physiological baggage. People who love to cling to things can project that to people. We all develop an emotional history when we date. Songs, scenery and places become emotional landmarks.

Some people want to freeze time despite what the desires of their partner. That is abnormal. The person holding on will use the label of love to justify their desperation to hold on no matter what. This converts a selfish act into a valiant gesture. People who are insecure will most likely say, "I love you." When they mean "I feel secure with you, please don't take that away from me."

Women have a natural ability to nurture. They may say, "I love you," when they mean, "I want to mold you into the person I see in my head." This type of women is can develop control through manipulation.

A successful love is based on a clear understanding of the type of love agreed on and a commitment to work at it despite outside persuasions. Leave nothing to chance. Communicate honestly and frequently. Each person is responsible to provide the other with emotional updates on their feelings about the relationship. In the mean time, each person should work on his or her own disciplines and issues before making a commitment.

James joined the New York City Police Department and patrolled crime infested streets, much like the neighborhood he grew up in. Johnson retired after 20 years with the New York City Police Department.

No comments:

Post a Comment